Living a Lovely Life: Forgiving Past Hurts

Hey Guys! I was gone for a full weekend to a Woman's retreat with my church and the place we went had absolutely no service! It was so great and so refreshing to not have to worry about looking at my phone all the time. It gives you the opportunity to actually talk and hangout with people and have the best time because you aren't distracted by social media!

Woman's retreat is something my mom and I do every year and it's one of my all time favorite weekends! This year, I was asked to speak at the retreat, there was a moment of panic but I so enjoyed sharing Jesus with everyone! I have posted what I taught below so y'all could read it too!

LOVE LEADS TO FORGIVING

Today I wanted to talk about Forgiving past hurts. I have to be honest, when my mom told me Mrs. Jo wanted me to speak this weekend, there was a moment of sheer panic, although I am still a little panicked, I am very excited to be doing this. Another thing I was scared and excited about was this topic. Scared because It’s something we all struggle with, but I was so excited to see what God showed me while I studied His word. I wanted to start by sharing my experiences with hurt and forgiveness. I have heard the saying “People that are closest to you have the ability to hurt you the most” and I have experienced that before in my life, as well as probably everyone else in this room. When you are hurt by someone that hasn't made a big impact on your life it’s so much easier to just shake it off. However, when you are hurt by someone you care about, that’s when forgiveness takes major strength. All of us have been hurt in the past. A lot of times people use words to hurt, I personally have been hurt by words. and If you let them, negative words can define you but I am learning through God’s word how to handle things. You can accept those words or you can choose to believe who you are in Christ. After I graduated from high school I was so excited because I started Esthetician School. A little back ground story- I have always struggled with acne which led to a big time struggle with insecurity. I began seeing an esthetician in middle school and my skin improved more and more each time. Finally, it was my senior year, by that point I was much more confident and I had such a passion for skin care and desired to have an impact on someones self esteem. So for me, Esthetician school was a no brainer. Well, one night one of my friends started making mean comments about my career choice, and the school that I chose. Even though they were joking, I was really hurt by it. In that moment I had some choices to make. I don't know if anyone else is like me, but I can take one comment and turn it into a million different things. For instance, I could have let their words define me. I could have felt like a complete failure, I could have questioned why I didn't choose a University, I could have believed that I wont accomplish much at all. Or I could ignore their words and listen to what God says about me instead. So What did I do? I took what the bible says about turning the other cheek very literally and I walked away. Forgiveness is more than just letting your friend or that random rude stranger off the hook. It’s so important because it’s about our own spiritual growth in Christ. I have narrowed it down to this, Forgiveness should be defined as loving someone like Christ loves us- I actually titled this whole message, “Love leads to forgiveness”. I want to focus on how God views us even when we mess up, how Jesus is our perfect example on how to forgive, and finally what the Bible says about how we should treat those who have wronged us.

One of my all time favorite stories in the bible is found in John chapter 8 verses 1-6. This story is not necessarily about forgiving others but its a perfect look at how Jesus views us and gives us grace upon grace.

1 but Jesus went to the Mount of Olives.

2 At dawn he appeared again in the temple courts, where all the people gathered around him, and he sat down to teach them. 3 The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group 4 and said to Jesus, “Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. 5 In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?” I feel like this is such a good example of what we do in our own lives. We don't necessarily stone people but when people hurt us its like we forget every bad thing we have ever done, we want them to be shamed, we want revenge, when want them to “get what they deserve” I heard a pastor say it this way once WE ALWAYS WANT GRACE FOR US AND JUSTICE FOR EVERYONE ELSE 6 They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him.

But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. 7 When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” 8 Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.

9 At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. 10 Jesus straightened up and asked her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?”

11 “No one, sir,” she said.

“Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus declared. “Go now and leave your life of sin.”

Another perfect example of how we should forgive is found in Luke 23:33-34

“When they came to the place called the Skull they crucified him there, along with the criminals- one on his right and one on his left.Jesus said, Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing”.

I absolutely love that verse— its a perfect image of grace. After going through complete and utter torture - Jesus looked upon all of us undeserving people and simply said “Forgive them”. I cant help but think that’s exactly what Jesus wants us to say towards every person that has wronged us “Father forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing”.

The last verse I want to read is found in Romans chapter 12 verse 20 “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty give him something to drink. In doing this you will heap burning coals on his head”. Growing up I never really liked when My mom would always tell me to “be the better person” and I have now found a bible verse to back that statement up. Honestly though, I am so thankful for her telling me that over and over and over because it has helped me grow as a person. I want to close with this last statement— I am learning that the moment we decide to live a life devoted to sharing the love of Christ, forgiveness is no longer and option.